Onesie McSingleton

Having been off for a week and a half, I am really, really struggling to get back into my job. To be completely honest I hate it.

On the plus side I went ahead and applied for the £10,000 MMU short story competition. I hold out absolutely no hope that I could win; I did my degree there and I know they will choose a story that is weird for weird's sake. But still I feel like more of a real writer just because I've actually tried.

In other news, not sure if it's good or bad, I've had a sort of idea for a children's story. And I mean children children, like the tiger who came to tea level. 

I don't even like children, never mind think about writing for them. But then I was wallowing in my new single life and updated my status with 'Onesie McSingleton is going to Arta tonight'. Onesie McSingleton. I love the rhythm of it and that must be why it got stuck in my head, repeating over and over until I started to wonder what kind of person would be called Onesie McSingleton.

He's a wee boy in a tartan onesie, who's favourite phrase is "I can do it all by myself". There's also a girl called Tutu (I can't decide on her surname though), and another male character as yet unnamed.

It's strange to be thinking at this level, but at the same time it's nice to know my idea cylinders are still firing.

Write-off

I'm just going to write off the last 6 months. There are very few ways they could have been worse. Two family members died, I faced possible redundancy, I had (am having?) a major Faith issue, and just yesterday my boyfriend decided it's 'best for me' if we break up. I'm calling BS on that last one. In what way is breaking my heart, making the last 18 months of my life a waste of time, and taking away the one solid-seeming thing left in my life 'best for me'?

So yes. Write-off.

On the plus side, I had a new flash of inspiration. I have no idea at the moment how big or small this plot might be as it is so new I still need to work out all the details. It is at least a short story, but definitely has the potential to be a novella/novel. Just need to get the bones written down and in order so I can really work it out and then really work on it! 

Ooh shiny

I am so easily distracted sometimes, I feel like a small child. 

Things currently distracting me from writing:
- crochet
- cross-stitch
- baking
- Thai boxing
- Downton Abbey

Feeble, I know. In the absence of inspirational flashes I really struggle to make myself write. But those flashes are few and far between at the moment so I need to keep kicking myself into gear and just keep up the writing. 

My plan is to dig out my old 'How To Be A Writer' book and do one of the exercises in it before Monday. It'll be better than nothing.

I think too much

In a fit of utter boredom I googled 'writing prompts'. There are some awful, AWFUL writing prompts out there.But that's not the point of this. The point is that one prompt stood out to me:

There was once a chance I didn't take.

It seems simple enough doesn't it. It probably is simple enough, but my brain will not let it go.

I get writing about a chance that you did take. You gave the guy your number and he called you, it blossomed into the most wonderful love ever, you got married, he cheated on you, you divorced him and moved to Brazil.  Logical.

But how do you write a whole story about a chance you didn't take? You could have given him your number, but didn't so you never saw him again...

Where's the story? This is really bugging me. It's two or three days since I did that Google search and I cannot let it go. How can I possibly write about I chance I didn't take?

Inspiration

Last Sunday I took part in the Race for Life. It was incredibly hard and made me feel sick but it was worth it because I raised over £500 for Cancer Research.

It was also worth it because it gave me an idea for a story. Not like a competition brief where I ponder over the idea for days or weeks and then plod through writing the story. A proper, flash of light, couldn't write fast enough to keep up with my imagination, solid idea.

I cannot explain how amazing it felt to be writing like that again. It makes me feel like maybe I am a writer after all.

The inspiration and story both made me cry though. Hopefully next time I get a flash it won't be so personal or painful.

Curses

It is a children's story competition. Rats.

Thinking about it, I quite like the story I've written and don't really want to change it. So I'm going to recycle Jack and his crazy modern family into a whole new story, just for those not yet old enough to know what hormones are.

The only problem is I have absolutely no plot ideas, and a bake sale on Friday for which I am providing everything. This story is not going to be written this week. For reals. But I suppose baking doesn't take a great deal of brain power so I can set that one bit of my mind to thinking up ideas in the background while I get on with trying to work out how to make and transport enough fairy cakes for 36 people. 

The human brain is a remarkable thing.

P.S. the bake sale is to raise money for my Race For Life this Sunday (shameless plug alert).

http://www.raceforlifesponsorme.org/hannahthorley-forgrandma

Time for a re-think

While skimming through the competitions on the Writing Magazine website I noticed one small phrase jump out of the modern family competition brief:

'Writing for children'

I do not remember that phrase being in the magazine brief, and I am going to double check the second I get home. Because if that phrase is in there, I have some serious rewriting to do.

Writing for children is so different to writing for adults. There has to be a point for the kids, a moral or lesson to take away from it. You can't just write any old rubbish and call it literary fiction. To be perfectly honest, I don't know if I can write for children. As far as I can remember I have never even tried to write for them, as it's far easier to target those at my mental age (17) so I know what they'll enjoy.

However, after the shambles that was my last attempt at competition-writing I'm going to give it a go anyway. It's definitely free entry so I have nothing to lose.

Who knows, maybe I'll discover that children's writing is actually my calling!

Sod's law

I was planning to enter a writing competition for which the brief was to write about someone who couldn't sleep. After too much thought I bashed out an attempt, which wasn't very good. Because the deadline was so close I decided to abandon the story as I wouldn't have time to properly proof and edit it even if I could fix it.

Deadline day arrived and I was feeling disappointed in myself. I had been so determined to finally enter a competition, but when it came down to it I just couldn't. Then while I was walking home from work I had a sudden flash of inspiration - I could make the story work! And the deadline was midnight so I could still submit in time!

I rushed home, turned my laptop on...and remembered that the story was only saved on my work computer.

Lesson learned: save your work EVERYWHERE.

What's in a name?

I suck at creating titles for my work. Occasionally it just jumps out at me, like it did for my assignment The Meaning of Freedom. But mostly I just sit with the story in front of me, staring at it as though I can force it to give me its name, before giving in and calling it something so unimaginative I'm almost ashamed of myself.

The story about 7-year-old Jack and his modern family is written, hooray! Now I have to name it, not so hooray.  I am starting to wonder if my poor titles affected my marks on my degree, and if they've ever stopped me winning a competition.

How do you even fix that? Is there a 'Title Writing' course out there? I wouldn't be surprised, actually. 

Well I've got at least a month to think about it so maybe something will come to me.

Competition

Yesterday I discovered a short story competition with a prize of £10,000.
Yes, you did read that right. No, I did not accidentally add one too many noughts. It's ten thousand for a maximum of 2,500 words. 

More details here: http://www.manchesterwritingcompetition.co.uk/

There's a part of my brain that thinks a story capable of winning so much money must be epic, and there's no way I can write anything £10,000 good.   There's another part of my brain that's still, almost 24 hours later, going "ten thousand? Ten thousand?? That's just...ten thousand?"  Honestly, I don't know what I would do if I suddenly had that much money. 
And there's that voice again saying I don't need to worry what I would do because I could never write anything good enough.

But I am choosing to ignore that voice. My lovely boyfriend has offered to pay the £17 entry fee for me (apparently it makes him happy when I write) so I have absolutely nothing to lose. I'm going for it!

I'm also going for a slightly less lucrative writing competition in the writing magazine I subscribe to. This month's competition is to write about 7-year-old Jack and his 'modern day' family.  As soon as I read the brief I had an idea for my story, which hasn't happened for a good long while so I'm confident that it will turn out well. Or at least better than my novel.
The prize for this one is only £100 (only!!) but it's free to enter so I may as well.

It's working. I'm starting to feel like a writer again.

Serendipity

I did not lose my job - hooray! Instead the other Admin girl and I have been cut down to 4 days per week instead of 5. 

Honestly, now I'm over the shock and relief of it all I'm actually quite looking forward to that spare day. After spending an hour with a calculator, two spreadsheets and my internet bank account I've worked out that I can still survive on 4 day's pay, so I don't need to spend that free day frantically applying for any and all jobs. I could write instead.

This might be the perfect opportunity for me to really make a go of a writing career. I would have one whole day every week with the flat to myself when my flatmate goes to her job; no work to go to, nobody to distract me (aside from myself) and not a great deal to do other than write.  

I've already set part of my brain to thinking up stories and articles I could write, and if I keep running out of jobs to do at work (highly likely) I could even begin writing some of them to get a headstart.


Perhaps this incredibly stressful job-at-risk period is actually one of the best things to happen to me.

Sparked

Well, it worked. Creating those characters seems to have given my writing mind a kick up the backside and now I can't stop. Yesterday I wrote a whole story, start to finish, for the first time in months. It's rubbish but at least I wrote it! Now to begin editing.

I may have more time for writing after today, as this afternoon I have a meeting in which I will find out if I'm being made redundant. Obviously I'd like to keep my job because I need money to live. But at the same time the thought of not having to cram my writing into the evenings is quite appealing.

We'll see what happens.

Lisa Lassek

Okay, now I have been slacking. Or you could call it coping with a family funeral and the threat of redundancy in the same 24 hour time period. Either way, there is no character for yesterday, and today's is fairly basic. But at least I'm writing SOMETHING.

Lisa Lassek is a 35-year-old stay at home Mum and foster carer. She has two children of her own (a boy and a girl) and specialises in fostering siblings together so they don't have to be split up. This is possible because she and her husband live in a massive house. The husband, Markus, has an extremely well-paid job and Lisa got a large sum of money when her Grandmother passed away so they bought a 6-bedroom house expressly for fostering siblings.

Lisa has light brown hair, kept in a bob, and hazel eyes. She is very thin and toned because she gets up at 5am every day to work out before anyone else is awake. She has a secret dream of one day running in the London Marathon.

Paul Askwith, Gabriel Page

I have not been slacking. I wrote up a character on Sunday and Monday, but due to family things I didn't have chance to type them up.

Paul Askwith was hard work. He just did not want to become a fully formed character. So his is more of a character sketch. Gabriel Page, on the other hand, is already pushing me to write his story. So without further ado.

Paul Askwith is 20 years old. He is a student of Sociology in his second year at university. He is not exactly the ideal student; turning up to lectures occasionally and only scraping a pass for every single assignment. This lack of effort is because Paul spends the majority of his time throwing or attending parties in the student halls where he still lives.
He has absolutely no idea what he wants to do with his life, and only took Sociology because his parents expected him to go to uni and it sounded like the easiest course he could actually do. This lack of direction terrifies Paul, which is partly why he won't (or can't) put any effort into his course.

That's it for Paul.

Gabriel Page is a 10-year-old boy who lives at home with his mother, father, brother and two sisters. One sister and the brother are older than Gabriel, and the other sister, Love, is 7 years old.  Gabriel and Love are very close. The elder sister recently revealed she is pregnant which, as she isn't married, makes the house a very tense and hostile place to be. Gabriel often takes Love to a small park across the road from the house to get away from the tension. As well as playing at the park they read together, or read their school reading books to each other.
Gabriel doesn't do very well in any subject at school except for English. He has read all the set books for the year and now his teacher brings in her own books for Gabriel to read. He also finds his own spelling words from the dictionary while the rest of the class learns the set words.
He does have a lot of friends at school, but they all live away in the posh side of town so he never spends any time with them outside of school.
Whenever asked, Gabriel says he wants to be a doctor. But really he wants to be a novelist and has several books and stories hidden under his bed that he has written over the years.

Miranda Rivers

It was very difficult not to make her exactly the same as Miranda Hart! Oh the power of a name. Anyway this is what I got:

Miranda is 33 years old, but people often think she's ten to fifteen years older because of the way she dresses, and the fact that her hair is naturally very curly so looks like a perm.
She is very short and has a soft body shape; not highly toned but not fat either. Her hair is dark blonde, almost brown, and her eyes are blue. She wears glasses with small square frames.
Miranda has very few friends as she is extremely shy and soft spoken.
She has a lot of money as both parents died when Miranda was 25 and left enough in their will that she doesn't need to work. She volunteers as a lollipop lady for her local primary school every week day, and is surprisingly fierce with drivers who refuse to slow down or stop.
Miranda has never once painted her nails. She keeps them short because if they get too long she ends up scratching herself accidentally.
She had a boyfriend in college, but they broke up when he moved away to university. Although liking the idea of a relationship, Miranda is too timid to speak to men so it's unlikely she will ever find one. Instead she owns a cocker spaniel and two cats to keep her company.
She lives in a two-bedroom house in which the second bedroom has been turned into a library, with mismatched bookshelves from her parents, grandparents, and Ikea. 
She drinks chamomile tea with a few drops of lemon or hot water, and eats mainly meat from the butchers and fresh veg. Her one indulgence is cinnamon pastries, which she eats secretly in her room even though there is nobody at home to see her.


She sounds very lonely doesn't she? But she's content enough when I imagine her. I don't think she has a sad personality.

Tomorrow's name: Brian Sparrow.

I'm a writer

Or so I keep telling people.

But if I'm completely honest I can't remember the last time I wrote something creative. 

It's not through lack of desire. I love writing and it's an enormous part of who I am. Or it was. 

I suspect it's a confidence issue because (if my memory is correct) I think I haven't written anything since the day I realised my partly finished novel was complete rubbish.

But I'm not ready to admit that my £30,000 student debt is all for nothing because my goal of being a writer is just a childish dream. I am a writer, so I'm going to write! Starting off small so I don't scare myself off.

First prompt: 
I collect names from film credits. Any name that stands out to me gets written in my notebook or saved in my phone 'just in case'. I've been doing it for years, ever since the name Zach Wolf jumped off the screen and presented itself as the name for the male character in my doomed novel.
But since Zach I've never actually used any of the names.

So for the next week I'm going to take one name every day and turn them into a character. As detailed as I can manage in one day with nothing but a name to build on.

I'm already quite excited about this! Usually I have very clear characters in my head and try to find a name that fits them. Working this way round will be a real challenge, which is just what I need.

Tomorrow's name: Miranda Rivers.

Time for a bit of waffle

I lost all illusions (delusions?) of healthy eating the other day when I nommed my way through a sausage butty. And the Tunnock's teacake I just ate. Although to be fair to myself, the only reason I had a GINORMOUS craving for the teacake was because I nearly killed myself at boxfit this morning. It got to the stage where I was telling my muscles to work harder and nothing was happening, they had absolutely no more to give me, and I kept going anyway. I actually thought I was going to fall over when the class finally finished. I suspect I'll have trouble even getting out of bed tomorrow, but the sense of well-being I have right now pre-emptively makes it worth it.

Today I realised that my final assignment is due in four weeks and three days. Then I realised that for one of those weeks I'm going to be at camp and will have absolutely no chance to work on it. Cack! I've got the minimum word count so technically I could just leave it as is and spend that time editing it, but I don't want to. The range is 15,000 to 25,000 words (which is ridiculously wide if you ask me) and it worries me that I might have 10,000 words less than some other people. At the same time it's highly unlikely that I can write a good quality 10,000 words in the three weeks available to me. So I'm aiming for around 18,000 to 20,000 for my final word count. Hopefully a nice balance between quality and quantity.

In other news, I found out the likely date of my graduation today - it's about 19 weeks away. I also found out that THERE WILL BE KILTS!! 

Oh it's going to be a good day.

xXx

Update

Okay, I am slightly ashamed that it's now been almost three weeks since I last wrote anything here. But not too ashamed because I've been busily writing things for my masters instead! I'm up to 15,000 words on my novel, I've figured out what to do for my CX assignment and I've even started it. Feeling productive :) 

In other news I've applied for a job that I really, really want to do up here. It's a clerical assistant in a primary school, which may not sound that great, but it's perfect for me. Not only would I get to indulge my OCD by alphebetising and filing things, I'd also get to help out with putting up the wall displays. I've always wanted a go at that! Plus the job's 30 hours a week so I would have enough time to keep writing and having a social life, and it's enough money for me to stay here in Glasgow.

I also have an extra reason for wanting to stay in Scotland now. Namely that I've found that nice Scottish man I was searching for. We've been out a few times and I really like him, I'm actually a bit annoyed that I'm going home soon and won't get to see him for two weeks. But oh well, he'll still be here when I come back.

I'm so happy right now it's probably obnoxious :p

xXx

Productivity

At the beginning of this year an assignment was due that included a synopsis and blurb of my novel. One result of doing this assignment was that the planned ending of my book was changed entirely, and since then I haven't written a single new word of it. 

But after a tutorial I realised the problem wasn't that I had changed the ending, it was the fact that I was thinking about the ending at all. I had figured out that it was over 60,000 words away and I had no idea how to fill that much writing space. So yesterday I sat down and spent a good two hours working out what could and should happen between the start and the end. Here's the result:

Isn't it pretty. The colours represent the importance of the event, so I made sure I had at least one amber or red event for each day. Friday looks a bit frantic doesn't it! 

 And this prettiful chart helps in two ways. Firstly I can start writing again because I know exactly what's going to happen next, and after that, and after that and so on. Secondly the entire 80,000ish words have been broken down into 16 little chunks. I can think about it as writing 16 short stories, which I already know I can do because I have around that number of short stories to my name. Even better is the fact that I've already written a few of the chunks so I only have 10 or 11 to go. 

Suddenly writing a whole novel doesn't seem like such an impossible task.

xXx

I'm a fraud

Well, I at least feel like one every time the words 'I'm a writer' come tripping out of my mouth. It takes my brain about a millisecond to point out that it can't actually remember the last time I sat down and just wrote something, and that I've only ever won one writing competition and that didn't have a prize, and that I can't even write in my blog regularly. Then this other voice chips in with something along the lines of "if you spent as much time writing as you did dancing you'd probably be published by now."  

 I don't actually think that voice is right, I would just be a lot further on with my novel, but it is making a good point about my priorities. I love salsa, it's the most fun I've had for a while and there are very few things that can make me smile as much as I do when dancing, but it's not what I want to be. I want to be a writer. A proper writer who wins competitions and has books published and actually earns a bit of money from it. But that's not going to happen unless I sort myself out and actually do some writing!

It's time to give myself a kick up the backside, stop faffing about on facebook and get on with it. Off I go!

Oh wait... I need to make some biscuits for housegroup tonight. But after that I will write like I've never written before!

xXx